I know there are times that I must make God laugh, but there are times when God makes me laugh too, and this is one of them.
Since making the decision that I'm going to sponsor a new African child, I've been so eager to just jump in and do it, but God has not yet provided clear direction on which child He has chosen especially for me. Waiting is so hard for me!!! And yet I wait... but not patiently, I must admit.
First, there was Moses. An adorable 6 year old in overalls -- I am overly fond of children in overalls, I just think they are so adorable -- and I definitely knew Moses was the child for me. Of course, I hadn't yet asked God His opinion on the matter, so I set forth to do that very thing. I asked Him specifically to show me whether or not I should sponsor Moses, and then I proceeded with my Bible study for the day. Not a word in there to answer my question. I was startled. He always answers one way or the other, but not to even mention it?? I headed back to the Compassion site to look at Moses once more... and Moses was gone. Out of the subset of children I had searched under, Moses was the only one that someone else had in that hour I was gone decided to sponsor... Okay, God, so that was a definite no on Moses.
I wait. A couple of days pass with no clear direction, I've studied the profiles of the children in the subset multiple times and none seems to jump out at me, and then one day two new children are added. One was named Polycarp. Polycarp!! Who trained under the disciple John and then led the church at Smyrna!? Yes, yes, this little Polycarp must be the child for me!! But of course I have to pray about it first. Again no clear answer at all. Frustrating. I went back that evening to have another look, and what do you know, Polycarp was gone. None of those other children on the list, just Polycarp. Sigh. Another no.
And then another child drew my attention. Adam. Yes, Adam could be the right child for me, couldn't he? And boom, five minutes later, Adam is gone. I'm not kidding!!
Next my attentions were drawn to a child named Timothy. I had seen him several times and not thought he was the one, but now I was beginning to wonder. I was already composing letters to him in my head -- To Timothy, my true son in the faith... :o) So last night, I sit down to ask about Timothy, and this time I specifically said, PLEASE don't just NOT answer my question this time. Whether it's yes or no or whatever the answer is, PLEASE ANSWER!!!! And He did. I proceed to my Scripture reading to see His answer emblazoned on the page before me: "wait for the promise of the Father..." and "it is not for you to know the time or the season..."
I noticed this morning that Timothy -- and only Timothy -- is missing from the subset of children.
And I just had to laugh.
And so I continue to wait....